The kiss tells you everything you need to know. I am primarily a kisser of men, so I will speak from that perspective.
That light, gentle, tentative kissing is ok, but if it lasts more than 30 seconds, then you are signing up for a steady diet of plain vanilla. Likewise, the man whose tongue goes straight for your esophagus is pushy, crude and selfish. However, the man that kisses confidentially, but carefully until he learns a bit more about you, is a good start.
A first kiss can say an awful lot about you!
Then…Where are his hands? Shoulder? Nah. Waist, maybe. Face, better. Tangled in your hair, getting warmer. One holding your wrist at your side, and the other wrapped around the back of your neck…thumb resting lightly against the base of your throat? Winner!
Where is his body? Maintaining a comfortable margin of safety between you. No fun. Grinding into your hip like a 21-year-old at a frat party? No thank you. Terribly close, but still a half inch away…so that you have to decide whether or not to step in. Perfect!
Is he making any noise? Whining like a puppy? Just no! Quiet…maybe. Occasional moan or growl of appreciation? Yes, please!
What’s the follow up? Stammering and sweaty hands, or a look like a drowning man, as he gasps? Of course not. Grabbing your arm and trying to drag you caveman style for the nearest bed, chair, kitchen counter, backseat or park bench? Too greedy, no. Stepping back to gauge your reaction, while wearing a pleased expression…and one of those smiles like he knows what Santa is bringing you for Christmas? This man is dirty-minded, and understands the value of delayed gratification. He is a keeper!
And before anyone hollers at me…my answer assumed pre and ongoing consent between potentially freaky adults.